Thursday, May 29, 2008

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

And now it's my birthday!

Hooray! Hooray! Hooray! Today's my actual, official birthday! I'm officially 14 today! Hooray!

I'm a tadbit sorry to stop being 13. I liked it. Acting like a depressed teenager was fun. But oh well. 14 calls me. I leave now.


Monday, May 26, 2008


Guess what? Yesterday was my birthday. Well, not my official birthday (which is tomorrow), but we had the party yesterday.

My party was a lot of fun. I got mobbed three times by my friends, but I still had a bunch of fun. We played lots of games, including "Mad Gab". Which was fun. Especially because I got to make up my own phrase for it ("Him a grin song" - guess what it is). Then we opened presents. One of cousins played something of a joke on me. She bought me Abbey Road (which I already have), with the gift receipt taped to it. I have full intention of going and exchanging it for an album I don't have. Other things I got were speakers and a dock to put my iPod in (so I can play it aloud in my room), more gift cards than I need, a butter dish (from my uncle who kidnapped me and helped me ask for a butter dish at the video store), and - a very ugly statuette of a duck. My dad gave me that one. We call it the "ugly duck" (say ugly like oogly, like you've got a British accent or something), and it used to live in a furniture store near our house. Whenever we took a walk, we'd go over to that store and admire its ugliness. It's a red duck with two left feet, and it's holding a bouquet of fake green flowers. It is tacky. Truly. I was half excited, half angry to have gotten it. Though I thanked mum and dad anyway. In revenge, however, I put the duck on the stairs that lead to mum and dad's bedroom.

So I had a lovely day yesterday, and today's my last day of being thirteen. Fourteen, here I come!

Saturday, May 24, 2008


Since my birthday is tomorrow (well, not really; it's really on the 27th, but we're having the party tomorrow), my Aunt Diane, Uncle Gary and Cousin Jhenya (Jhenya's not their daughter, by the way) decided to do something fun with me. They're rather strange people, though, with a strange sense of humor. So, they played a round of ding-dong-ditchit with me, and I found a long piece of cardboard, like a poster, in front of the door. It had gnomes taped to it (yes, real garden-gnomes; they know I hate gnomes), and it basically said "We are kidnapping you!" Then they came, wearing bizarre little animal noses (you know, those fake animal noses that you wear on a string in front of your real nose) and other paraphenalia. They blindfolded me and took me into their car. Except then I realized I needed my shoes. So my mum came with my shoes, and I had to put them on blindfolded, and I kept yelling for my raincoat (there was no need for a raincoat).

Properly dressed, I was ushered into the car, and they drove off with me, taking me to who-knows-where. I pretended to be able to see without my eyes, and I pretended I knew what they were doing. My sister (who had come along) got rather a kick out of this. And then I started pretending to scream out the window. Then I began a rendition of "They're Coming to Take me Away, Ha-Haa!" All while blindfolded.

Finally we got to where we were going. Apparently they were taking me to a mall-type place, with a bunch of stores, restaurants, a cinema, ect. We went to a pet store, where we looked at puppies and hamsters, and then they took me on a ferris wheel that was there! It was so fun! And then we went to have lunch at California Pizza Kitchen, which was fun. We all said weird things at the table (funny weird things). After that, I insisted they take me to Barnes and Noble, so I went into the CD section and started looking at all the CD's. Then Jhenya and I started talking about long songs, and we realized how rediculously long 23 minutes is for a song. We left, but after persistent badgering in the car that we do so, they took me to a video store. I did not tell them why, but finally when we were there, I informed them that I had the intention to ask the people who worked there if they had any butter dishes. I did so, and to great comic effect. And then they took me home.

As you can see, it was a great deal of fun. I can't wait for tomorrow.

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

I Just Realized...

....Freezer-burned cheese is probably one of the most disgusting substances on earth.

Monday, May 19, 2008

Official Mentally Disordered Peoples' Meeting

I was at a party last night (a graduation party, as I'm going into high school next year). There were tons of people there, and we all went to a restaurant called the Macaroni Grill. Well, there was a sheet of paper instead of a tablecloth, and I got the bright idea to draw stuff on it with my pencils. I had a dementedly good time with that. And while we were all waiting for our food, I started to hold an "Official Mentally Disordered People's Meeting". Of course, there was only really one other person I knew who was mentally disordered there, so I pretended all the utensils and stuff at the table had mental disorders. Except then the pepper died of depression (guess what that means). So then I just started diagnosing the stuff there. The jar of oil was OCD, the packets of sugar were hypomanic, the pepper was depressed, my cup was clinically insane, the meat had MPD, the straws were anorexic, the knife had anger management issues, and the table had them all. And me? I was their autistic ringleader.

Sunday, May 18, 2008

Last Night

I got high last not. Not on drugs, but on my dad's rock and roll. You see, he's in a band with some of his friends, and they had a concert last night. The band is called Me and Them (which is quite funny). They do a lot of benefit concerts, and they did one last night. It was the best this time, because they recently got a drummer for their band. Previously, they were good. Now they're great. I remember just sitting there, watching them perform. The music came at me like a great sonic blast or something, and I remember absorbing it and just having the time of my life. Gino (my friend) filmed it. Hopefully it'll be appearing on YouTube someday...

By the way: my website is giving away free hamsters now! And you don't even have to enter into anything to get one! Click here for details.

Saturday, May 17, 2008

Stupid Warning Labels

I somehow stumbled upon this site. I was reading the part with the warning labels. Man, are those FUNNY! Nothing makes me laugh more than to think how stupid people have been. My dad always says that whenever there's a stupid warning label, then it means that someone actually tried it. Here's some of the funniest:

"Caution: The contents of this bottle should not be fed to fish." -- On a bottle of shampoo for dogs. (Uh...*tries to imagine someone feeding it to a fish*)
"Warning: This product can burn eyes." -- On a curling iron. (Well, duh!)
"Caution: This is not a safety protective device." -- On a plastic toy helmet used as a container for popcorn.
"Do not eat toner." -- On a toner cartridge for a laser printer. (Someone had to have been really stupid to get this one out there.)
"Not intended for highway use." - On a 13-inch wheel on a wheelbarrow.
"Eating rocks may lead to broken teeth." -- On a novelty rock garden set called "Popcorn Rock." (May lead to broken teeth?)
"Caution: Shoots rubber bands." -- On a product called "Rubber Band Shooter." (Well duh!)
"Please keep out of children." -- On a butcher knife.
"Do not look into laser with remaining eye." -- On a laser pointer. (Which raises the question of where the other eye went...hmm...*goes and looks for missing eye*)
"Do not use as ear plugs." -- On a package of silly putty. (I'm laughing as I imagine some mentally challenged person using these as earplugs...)
"Twist top off with hands. Throw top away. Do not put top in mouth." -- On the label of a bottled drink. (Which is funny, as I put the top in my mouth all the time.)

Also, I once saw my own personal silly warning. Once, my dad got me a little "Fruit-by-the-Foot" thing, and I (ever the reader) was reading the label. I pointed out, "Dad, look. It says 'Warning: Do not eat paper backing."

Friday, May 16, 2008


I took some pictures of the hamsters and thought they were worth putting up:

This is Jude, my hamster.
We named him after Hey Jude.
This is Jude meeting Roger, the other hamster.
I think Jude would probably eat Roger.

This is Fluffy, my sister's hamster.
It is not a Tribble.

Thursday, May 15, 2008

Everything I needed to know I learned from Pink Floyd

I just realized today that Pink Floyd can teach you a lot about life. If you don't believe me, then here, I'll show you:
"Don't take drugs."
"Life stinks. Build a wall."
"Sometimes people will fire you just 'cause they don't like you."
"Fire someone, and when you resign, they'll come right back in again."
"Be at least a little whimsical."
"It's not a good idea to have insane members in your band."
"Write 20 minute songs if it makes you feel good."

If I Was a DJ

The other day, my mum and I were driving in the car for some errands of ours, and we were listening to the radio. If you know me, then you know I love Queen, and so I was very excited when we tuned in during the middle of "We Will Rock You". That's actually the first time we've ever heard a Queen song on the radio. The next songs after that were all very good ones that we knew. Except it didn't last, and then they played some baaad ones.

This got me to say something like, "If I was a DJ, I'd only play good songs!" And then, being the imaginative person I am, I started rambling on about what I'd do exactly. I got it into my head that being a DJ, I could play whatever songs I liked, provided that I either had them or the radio station had them (I'm of the impression that DJ's can bring their own music from home, provided nobody's banned it from radio.) I also got it into my head that I'd play whole albums on occasion. Isn't that a lovely idea? I mean, 30-40 minutes of pure albumy beauty! Then Mum said, "What albums do you like start to finish?" Plenty, actually. Queen II comes to mind, as does A Night at the Opera. Then there's Dark Side of the Moon, Piper at the Gates of Dawn, Wish You Were Here, ect. Plus I like Eldorado start to finish. (Actually, it's a little wrong to listen to it otherwise.) That's what I'd do if I was a DJ. Maybe I'll have to become one when I grow up!

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Pippin's got a gig!

Torch, the band I'm in, has its first gig today. We get to play for a bunch of kids at our church, which ought to be fun. In fact, it would be great...provided I didn't have a sore throat and I have to sing. Everyone (except the ever-so-busy drummer) has to sing in our band, and I'm no exception, even when I'm busy playing bass. I ate a waffle and peanut butter this morning, and I suppose it has medicinal qualities, as my throat felt better after consuming it. I wonder, was it the waffle part or the peanut butter part that helped me most? Who cares.

I'll update this when I return from my gig, to tell everyone how it went. 


Okay, I got back from my gig. It was pretty good. I mean, we weren't perfect, and David (our singer-slash-keyboardist) wouldn't stop talking while my dad was doing the sound checks, so there was this bad rumbling noise throughout the whole thing. I intend to have a long talk with him next time I see him. Gino, our drummer, was probably the best of us. Sadie (the guitarist) made a mistake during our last song, and we almost messed up, and I, who was supposed to sing, didn't sing throughout the whole thing (plus I hit some bad notes on my bass). Gino didn't do anything wrong, and (shame on us), he was the only one who thanked Dad for setting up everything. But hey, it's a good start. Also, Gino and his mum videotaped the whole thing. We're going to see about putting it up on YouTube. Hey, didn't you hear? We're the next big thing in music!

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Stairway to Heaven Backwards?

Okay, I suppose we all know what happens when you listen to Stairway to Heaven backwards. In case you don't: you're supposed to hear these crazy backwards messages. You can look it up on YouTube. Anyhow, I was curious: it works when you listen to the studio version of the song, song by Led Zeppelin (Robert Plant, actually, but hey - that's not exactly important right now). Why not if you sing it yourself?

So that's what I tried. Using the audio editor program Audacity, I recorded myself singing the lyrics to Stairway to Heaven, except I didn't slur my words like Robert Plant does in the recording. Ever noticed how he always seems to slur his words weirdly on those Zeppelin recordings, eh? Well, I sang the words correctly, and I discovered that I could just barely hear some of it. But otherwise, I could hear none of it. Badgers, I don't know what this means. I guess that all we can gather from this is that it doesn't work when  you use proper pronunciation.


Behold. I have begun to write a blog! O joy!

Or not.

At any rate, I have begun to write my blog. As such, I feel the need to introduce myself to the world. My name is Pippin (not really, but it's what I make people call me), and I am a crazy genius. At least I seem to be genius. Maybe I'm just crazy. I am a writer, drawer, singer-songwriter, and hats-wearer. I like to read Redwall, Lord of the Rings, Chronicles of Narnia, the Inheritance Cycle, Warriors, and a few others. A true classic-rock-lover, I like listening to Queen, Led Zeppelin, Pink Floyd, the Beatles, Cream, Electric Light Orchestra, Simon and Garfunkel, and other people. I have pet hamsters, and I love them so. I also have an unusual look on life, sort of an idea that my life is a great story...oh never mind the philosophical-ness.

Let it be known. Pippin the Genius has come!

(By the way: I run this site.)