Official Mentally Disordered Peoples' Meeting

I was at a party last night (a graduation party, as I'm going into high school next year). There were tons of people there, and we all went to a restaurant called the Macaroni Grill. Well, there was a sheet of paper instead of a tablecloth, and I got the bright idea to draw stuff on it with my pencils. I had a dementedly good time with that. And while we were all waiting for our food, I started to hold an "Official Mentally Disordered People's Meeting". Of course, there was only really one other person I knew who was mentally disordered there, so I pretended all the utensils and stuff at the table had mental disorders. Except then the pepper died of depression (guess what that means). So then I just started diagnosing the stuff there. The jar of oil was OCD, the packets of sugar were hypomanic, the pepper was depressed, my cup was clinically insane, the meat had MPD, the straws were anorexic, the knife had anger management issues, and the table had them all. And me? I was their autistic ringleader.